The Hangover: ESPN Steps Out Of Their Tiny Little Universe

Devil Rays (off day)

Quick side note: You know what is great about yesterday’s off-day? At least one more day of people talking about how the Yankees are in last place tied with the Devil Rays. It is like informing a guy that his wife cheated on him with 5 guys at once. Really, it should be enough that she cheated…

Like many people, ESPN annoys the hell out of us on most days. Too much screaming, too much material that has nothing to do with sports (Who are the Sklar Brothers and why are they EVER on Sportscenter?) and way too much bias in their coverage. Seriously, ESPN didn’t even know NASCAR existed until they started broadcasting the races. Now it is wall-to-wall left-turns. Well, we are going to put aside our distaste and ask you guys to go visit their website today because they actually noticed there are baseball players that play for teams other than the Yankees and the Red Sox.

Today, ESPN.com has a poll asking readers who they believe were the top players for the month of May. It seems as if somebody actually does pay attention to Devil Rays players for their on-field accomplishments. James Shields is one of ten choices for pitcher-of-the-month. That’s nice. What is really impressive is that Shields is one of six choices for MVP for the month of May. So get your butts over there and start stuffing the virtual ballot box for James the Greater.

Carlos Pena is also mentioned as one of the candidates for “Biggest Surprise”. Anytime a guy has to be a spring training non-roster invitee for one of the worst teams in baseball and is among the league leaders in home runs…that qualifies as a “surprise”. (with thanks to Jim).

DEVIL RAYS WEBTOPIA…

• The Rays have trailed at some point in 19 of their 22 wins this season, which leads the majors. For some reason the team doesn’t wake up until the second half of the game. We are just spit-ballin’ here, but maybe Joe Maddon should have the team play 3-4 simulated innings before each game.
• It is no surprise that the Rays have looked into what the market would be for Elijah Dukes. It is also no surprise that no team is willing to part with any significant pieces and it is also no surprise that Jayson Stark reports that at least 20 teams would line up to sign Dukes if he is released.
• Bobby Abreu makes $15 million and can’t hit his way out of a paper bag these days. His problem? Apparently it is all Scott Kazmir’s fault. This is just like a Yankees fan. Always trying to one-up the Mets fans. It won’t work this time. Your Kid K-envy will never be as great as Mets fan’s.
• Seriously Mets fans just can’t let it go and it makes us giggle to no end. It has been three years since the trade and now Mets fans actually want you to believe their team is better because they traded Kazmir. (Excuse us for a second….) Ok, we are back. Very difficult to type while laughing…Just so we are all on the same page…because the Mets have Oliver Perez and he is pretty good, that justifies trading Scott Kazmir for a guy that won 10 games in 2+ years? Why do we get the feeling that Mets fans will continue to give us joy for years to come?

AL East Roundup: Dice-K Might Be Talking Trash…Or He Might Not

AL EAST	W	L	GB	L10	STK	E#
Boston Red Sox	26	11	–	8-2	W3	—
New York Yankees	17	19	8.5	5-5	L1	118
Baltimore Orioles	18	21	9.0	5-5	L3	116
Toronto Blue Jays	16	22	10.5	3-7	W1	115
Tampa Bay Devil Rays	15	22	11.0	3-7	W1	115

Red Sox 7, Tigers 1. Diasuke Matsuzaka said “I got your #3 starter right here.” Of course the interpreter might have mistranslated. Up to this point, Dice-K has been effective, if not over-powering. Last night, the Sox began to see return on their investment, as Matsuzaka pitched a complete game against the defending AL champs. He allowed only 6 hits, struck out 5 and did not walk a batter.

Blue Jays 5, Orioles 3. Troy Glaus drove in three including a 2-run home run in the 8th that proved to be the game-winner off of Danys Baez. Meantime, the Jays may have finally found a suitable replacement in the bullpen as Jeremy Accardo converted his second save and is yet to allow a run in 17.2 innings.

NOTE FROM AROUND THE AL EAST…

• Melvin Mora and Jay Payton nearly came to blows in the dugout following last night’s loss. Mora became heated when Payton mocked Sanjaya from American Idol*.
  
• Miguel Tejada’s excuse for only hitting two home runs this season? He is not a home run hitter of course. Maybe he forgot to take his “B-12” this season.
• Remember all the talk about the Yankees scoring a 1,000 runs this season? Not so much anymore. Alex Rodriguez has 1 home run in May. Bobby Abreu is in such a bad slump, that he has tried to bunt for a bas hit on several occasions in the past few weeks. Jason Giambi and Robinson Cano are both struggling. $200 million just doesn’t go as far as it used to.
• Roger Clemens had his first workout for the Yankees in Tampa. Must be a slow news day in the AL East.

* Might not be true.